What is “Crab Mentality”?

  

The term crab mentality is sometimes referenced as crabs in a bucket.  This is a phrase [or term] that is able to describe a way of thinking that basically translates into, “if I can’t have it, neither can you.”  The metaphor of crab mentality is derived from the reference of a pot of crabs.  Individually, a crab can escape easily, but when placed in a pot with other crabs they will diligently work to keep each other solidly within the pot.  The diligence is more or less an epic “king of the hill” competition that ultimately guarantees their unilateral demise. 

     Within human behavior, the analogy is often claimed to be that members of a certain group will attempt to negatively diminish the importance or image of any member who is able to achieve any level of success.  Whether the success is actual or perceived and exceeds that of fellow members.  This type of behavior is the result of competitive feelings, conspiracy or envy.  Crabs on the other hand are not pulling one another back into the pot due to these feelings, they are simply trying to escape singularly without the accompaniment of their fellow creature.  Human beings on the other hand desire to escape certain environments, but they do not wish for any others to do so and take away from their success or exceed it in any manner when they begin to embody the concept of crab mentality. 

     This is a term that has been broadly associated with non-constructive, short sighted thinking as opposed to the unified constructive, long term thinking.  The impact of this type of thinking was first quantified by a 2015 New Zealand study that was able to demonstrate upwards of 18% of an average exam improvement for students when grades are reported in a way that prevented others from knowing their position via published rankings. 

      The phrase has grown in popularity due to its ability of accusing opponents of crab mentality to become a common defense form against criticism.  This is regardless of whether or not the criticism is valid or not.  Dependent upon the context, the tactic of the crab mentality could very well fall under the logical fallacy that has been come to be known as argumentum as invidiam or the appeal to envy.  The reasoning for crab mentality may very well be envy as well as it being a behavioral trait that is indulged upon despite people having a working knowledge that it is more than disadventurous to them; it can arise from a scarceness of resources that can lead to competition that is perpetual. 

Crab Mentality in Popular Culture

        Crab mentality has found itself referenced and placed on display throughout a variety of outlets within popular culture.  For example, from the American hip-hop group Gang Starr referenced the behavior in a track titled, “Moment of Truth”.  Within this track he states the following, “selfish jealous punks will wanna pull you down, just like some shellfish in a bucket.”  Additionally, a hip hop artist from Canada released a single entitled “Crabbuckit” in 2004.  This song portrays the negative views of the music industry and was able to win the 2005 ‘Best Single of the Year’ at the Juno awards.  Popular artists such as the Aquabats, Jay Z, and Kanye West have also made reference to the term within their music. 

     Musicians are not the only ones that have done so.  The American animated television show “The Boondocks” has referenced crab mentality numerous times in relation to the current state of African American culture within the United States.  The miniseries “The Corner” that was featured on HBO contained a character that was able to observe the mentality while working a seasonal position.  He is able to make the connection to his very own attempts to transcend the ghetto of Baltimore and the meaning of crab mentality. 

Overview

     Crab mentality is a frame of mind that will leave all that encounter it no better than they were at their starting point.  There is no positive outcome for any that partake in the behavior and thought process nor those that are in close proximity to them.  At this time, it is not completely certain as to whether or not those participating in the behavior are fully aware that they are engaging in it.  Should they not be aware, there is truly no way to curb the behavior, since acknowledgment is key to change.  

A Diet of Names

    

It seems to be the latest diet craze…….shedding pounds by having people’s names wedged in your mouth all day every day.  I have noticed that the people that know the least, communicate never and associated rarely with a person have the most information to share and spread about someone.  What is even more shocking is the amount of people that feast on the regurgitated rubbish attached to the names.  They know that this person has no real connection to the one whose name is being digested, regurgitated and spit into the next mouth, but they take it in as if it were a communion cracker blessed on Sunday morning. 

    Now, I am not sure which is worse, the originator that is clearly suffering from “I lie like I breath syndrome” or the person that knows that they are lying and chooses to infect themselves with the syndrome.  But what is crystal clear, is that this new diet is not shedding pounds away, it is merely making for extremely strong jaws.  What else can you expect from a cackling bird chewing the fat of a name just to mother hen it over to the next mouth all day, every day.  This is an activity that you cannot take a break from or you lose your audience. 

     But let me take a moment right here to address those that enjoy having names for breakfast, lunch, dinner and a duo of snacks.  The vast majority of you will claim that you could care less about the person…..or that you don’t lie……or that you don’t do drama and steer clear of it; yet the person attached to the name isn’t around when you begin slinging sh*t like a frustrated monkey.  Nor is that person present or addressing you when you dive head first into a still pool creating an abundance of waves.  Not to mention, if you have NEVER confirmed any of the information nor have you had any meaningful interaction with said person…….where is your information coming from? Not the truth factory boo boo.  Therefore, you are a liar……you are about the drama and you gravitate towards it as if it were the flame to your moth…….you care a great deal about that person, because of jealousy. 

      Deny it all you want, but there is something about the name that you keep logged in your throat better than a porn star stuffs hers, that makes you feel inferior.  Yes, I said it…..heffa YOU FEEL LESS THAN.  This is why you have to carry tales quicker than SuperHead can carry an STD about a person that truly has no idea that you exist.  You are losing sleep, working overtime and missing out on life in order to carry out your campaign of slander while the person attached to the name……well they are continuing to live life and flourish.  So who is actually winning here?

   You have changed your diet to nothing by names that you spit pieces into mouth after mouth after mouth while caged in misery.  Your waistline is still the same.  Your face is resting on the floor.  Your friends aren’t true, they are just hungry for their next regurgitated piece, knowing that it is only a matter of time before your diet includes their names.  What is it to gain? Oh that’s right, the praise and solidarity of people too stupid and devious to recognize or care that you are a pathological liar that is self-hating. When broken down like that, how are you liking this diet of names that you are on?

Interracial Rejection: Trophy vs. Whore

     I recently read a blog written by a person that calls themselves a blogger.  Now I know that we all draw inspiration from our own lives, friends and family…..BUT we must draw a line.  It is HIGHLY inappropriate to pump information out of “friends” in order to gain readers and website views.  Also I am thoroughly DISGUSTED by the overt fact that the writer was rejected and decided to throw an acquaintance under the bus.  Where oh where to begin with this buffoonery?  This website wielding heffa admits that she was flirting with another woman’s man while on vacation.  Oh I know most that read the blog missed that!!!! From the beginning she saturated her blog with racist overtones.  Was it necessary to comment about the man’s dancing?  Which means that his rhythm would have been better if he would have chosen you over his wife that was looking on as you bumped and grind with him. 

   Boo boo, please STOP! But you didn’t.  You decided to go further and act as if your friend was a whore in comparison to a white woman that was at home watching kids while you all were on vacation TOGETHER.  Now how is the black woman a whore?  She has not been demoted to the status of help.  She is out at sea with you enjoying his money and affection.  Is it her complexion that makes you contend that she is the whore? His Sally Hemming to his Thomas Jefferson although she is NOT hidden? Are you jealous, because of the fact that a friend was financed by a fare skinned love interest?

     I find it morally repulsive that someone will leave a friend to find out that their most intimate details have been placed on a plate of public consumption via the internet.  What type of person has such a low amount of self-esteem that they uncover sensationalized details of a “friend’s life”?

     Moreover, I walked away from the blog feeling as if the writer was jealous.  I am on the outside looking in, and it seems expressly clear that someone is in a relationship with either themselves or a man that is not quite established.  Therefore, the fact that a gorgeous black woman that was sent on a cruise by her pigment challenged lover hit a nerve.  Additionally, the friend became the target AFTER a married man that was flirted with did not take a dance further than what it was. 

   This so called blogger needs to understand that a dance is a dance and just because a person is black and falls in love with a white person does NOT make them a whore.  Also, just because a man is NOT willing to cheat with you, it does NOT make his woman less than a treasure.  Not every woman is insecure.  Because you are, you do not speak for the rest of us.  Moreover, the fact that you threw your friend under the bus because you did not get vacation nukey, shows precisely what you are lacking in life. 

   Or did I miss something? I highly doubt that.  Just call me Kermit as I get my tea…

Love Avoiders and their Enablers

     There are millions of things written about people ignoring red flags when in love, but no one addresses the faux flags that are birthed by those who want to avoid love as if it were death.  Yes....you read that correctly.  To day we are going to explore those that have fallen in love, but don't want it; or just can't handle it.  The man that will swear that his devoted wife is cheating, yet each time he sneaks home early...checks her phone or the phone bill...stalks her social media pages finds NOTHING, but still makes her life miserable with accusations.  The woman that believes her man has a side chick, but he is so far up her tooty he can barely breathe.
     Both cases are examples of people that will allow fact and evidence to be ignored so that their desires can be justified.  They can walk away from envy provoking love fear and clear in conscience....or so they believe.  The will pay no attention to the devotion and love that has been bestowed upon them; that is until a cold night or a tragedy hits them.  Then there is a moment of breakdown.  But they still will NOT admit that love was kind to them or that they know desire and need it.
     When a love avoider suffers their breakdown, it becomes a stertorous vortex for the person that once loved them dearly and completely.  Because their love is no longer present due to the antics and games of the avoider, the former flame is blamed.  Are you surprised? An avoider is not one that will be honest.  They will lie and game and more to shuck and dive love's tackle.  At what point do you think that they will admit that their anger and heartbreak are their own fault? I will wait while you figure this out.......
     What makes the situation even worse is that love avoiders tend to have friends that will second their craziness.  This mixed with people that have been waiting in the wings to swoop them away from their love will further make them believe that their actions and antics are OK.  Unfortunately, as all these instigators and enablers gain maturity and begin to settle down....the love avoider will end up either alone or settling for another avoider.  This way you don't die singularly but you will die alone.
      We all know at leas one person that is a love avoider.  That friend, family member or ex that always has an excuse or a flat out  lie about why someone isn't right for them.  That person that during stressful situations in life will wage war on an ex or the person they are currently dating.  The question of the hour is...what do you do about it? Do you allow an innocent to be ripped apart because your buddy is afraid to be loved or admited that htey want love? Do you sit by and agree with their crazy? Or maybe you give approval via silence.
    Just keep in mind, an avoider could wreck your heart or that of your son or daughter.  Karma has a sneaky way of paying us back by paying it forward a generation or two.