Taz Honors Profile Names

   This installment of Taz Honors salutes the dumb ass profile names that I see every day all over social media.  The ones that do NOT come close to describing the person attached to it…..the ones that simply make no damn sense…..and the ones that describe the person better than they realize.  If you see yours on the list….take it as a hint to CHANGE THAT SHIT! Do not get all emotional…take the “l” and change your life…….if you get all emotional and combative, all I can say to you is, “I guess that’s how you were raised.”

    The top 10 most “interesting” profile names (including but NOT limited to FaceBook):

    1.       QueenBee - Are you lil Kim? You look more like you swallowed a country of bees and you are allergic! Are you reigning over the kingdom of broke bitches?

    2.       (Anything) Thick – You have the nerve to post pics all the while expecting us not to see that you are FAT.

    3.       TooBad – too damn bad you won’t go away.  You sit and post barely not naked pics and believe that you are the baddest thing walking because of all the likes and lying comments that you receive.  That you for reminding the rest of us that fuckable and able to be fucked with are too different things.

   4.       WettDreamz – we realize that you are HAVING WET DREAMS and NOT causing them.  People who are the subject of wet dreams need NO advertisement.

   5.       SugaMomma – now why did you pick this name when you claim NOT to be paying for penis? A suga daddy is paying for vagina.  So why get mad when guys want to be cashed out?

   6.       GladiatorInASuit – Do you work for Pope and Associates? Uh NO you don’t! What are you “gladiating” from the fryer at McDonald’s?

   7.       DontHateMeCuzImBeautiful – You can NOT look like the leader of the zombie apocalypse and tell someone NOT to hate on you.  PLUS you mud duck….NO ONE HATES ON THE UGLY….they just run from them!!!!!

   8.       BossChick – You need EMPLOYEES in order to be a damn boss.  You can NOT be in a shelter calling yourself a freaking boss!!!! Who are you the boss of…the bums on 3^rd street?

   9.       HerDreamMan – If you are SINGLE and begging for dates….who’s dream are you? The reality is…you can NOT speak every damn thing into existence.  You are a nightmare boo boo.

  10.   GotThatLongDeepStroke – Really dude? If you have a long deep stroke, bitches would be paying your bills and you would NOT need to troll the internet trying to moisten the panties off of heffas.  All advertisement is not necessary.  Sometimes advertisement just lets the buyer know what you DO NOT have.

In the future.....if you are going to name yourself something other than your parents did.....WHEN I CLICK ON YOUR PROFILE I SHOULD UNDERSTAND WHY YOU DID IT.  Be honest.  Many of you should be called:
                                               1. DumbAsFuck Johnson                                    
                                               2. ObeseAndLovingIt Williams                        
                                               3. MyKidsStarFiresAndShit Henderson        
                                               4. IFailedEveryEnglishClass Smith                
                                               5. BigBlackGreasyAndBroke Brady                  
                                               6. MonkeyMomma Jones
                                               7.  MagillaGorillasBabyMomma
                                               8. Remy TheBrokeAndShirtless
                                               9.  UglyAndSexlessInTheCity Ferris
                                               10. IGotFiveOnIt Jones